Breastfeeding and Religion and NIP in the church

A friend of mine has written this fabulous letter to her local pastor to explain about breastfeeding and the rights of babies to eat when they're hungry.  Doula Harley Jeannette has also written a note asking for help from concerned mothers to help her write up some good information and scripture information to support her letter.  If you can help, if you have some support and encouragement for her, Please write me a comment and I will forward it all to her!!!

A letter to my church about breastfeeding

Thank you for trying to look out for me as a sister. I won't cover up but I am willing to come to a middle ground. The reasons I won't cover are I feel it perpetuates bottle feeding as being the norm and further sexualizes women as things, as opposed to us being humans, daughters of Yahweh and puts more of a stigma on breastfeeding.

If it is his sin, I question WHY was it easier to say something to me when I am doing no wrong as opposed to him who was obviously sinning? Shouldn't a brother in Christ help him be accountable? We would be doing a disservice to him if we didn't.

Also, he is going to see women breastfeeding no matter where he goes. He needs to learn to deal with it and what better place than in our church, a safe place? If he isn't being held accountable by us aren't we just enabling him in his sin thus helping him continue it as opposed to us giving him a hand up?

What I am willing to do is for us to make seating arrangements where he sits in front of me. If I am behind him, he will not have that diversion. I also ask that the brothers talk with him and help brainstorm with him ideas on how to handle situations where this is not an option. If he is facing me in a conversation, I will not nurse in front of him because then I can understand the scripture reference of "not making him stumble". However, for me to cover up as a whole when he is around, I believe is taking the scripture out of context. Alcohol is a choice... my baby eating is not. Would you eat with a blanket over your head in the heat? It is hot in the cafe for sure. Besides I normally have 3 other children to mother over and a fidgety baby that is not use to covering.

Additionally, I believe it was inappropriate to ask me to cover up as opposed to asking him to move into a different position. This really does say how our culture still sees women and how breastfeeding is seen, even in our well intentioned church. It sends the message that breastfeeding is still a little "dirty" and something that should be hidden. The option I suggest is, "Hey Mama. There is a gentlemen that has an issue with pornography and does have difficulty with breastfeeding as well. What action you take while you are breastfeeding is up to you but it is appropriate that you know so that you are protected."

We are a small and new church. Because we are new and small, we have the chance to really set the precedence in how these types of situations are going to be handled from here on out. The person with the pornography addiction has the chance to learn appropriate boundaries in a safe environment with a mother that is willing to work with him AND we are encouraging breastfeeding which is the way Yahweh designed women and intended human babies to be fed. Win-win situation.

We can help the health of those mothers and babies. Breastfeeding literally saves lives by dramatically reducing breast cancer. Breastfeeding also reduces SIDS by at least 50%. Do we really want to dissuade mothers from this? Our culture has issues with how they view women. With our culture's problem, our church can be part of the solution. I am thankful this situation has arisen and that Yahweh chose me to handle this. I get to help set our church's viewpoint and really make a positive change!

Lastly, I wanted to say - Jesus was breastfed. Would one of you really go to Mary to ask her to cover while she fed our Saviour or would you take a more protective role of her motherhood?

Here is Jeannette's Facebook note looking for help:

As you can see, I have had a run-in with my church about breastfeeding without a cover. Look at my "a letter to my church about breastfeeding".

So my pastor/friend said he has an open heart about breastfeeding .. and I think he will listen if I present him with good information and scripture based information. So far I have these 2 links that I am going to print out for him to read:http://www.drmomma.org/2010/05/breastfeeding-in-public-christian.html#comment-form

and

http://breastfeedinglaws.uslegal.com/state-laws/georgia-breast-feeding-laws/

and

http://texas-midwife.com/breastfeeding.htm

and

http://www.openbible.info/topics/breastfeeding

What I need from all of are ALL POINTS FOR OR AGAINST COVERING WHILE NURSING IN PUBLIC .. as much SCRIPTURE BASED as possible. ANY information that you think might be beneficial from statistics about whatever to situations. Please ladies.. DO NOT debate this on this thread. I really need the focus on presenting information. Also, PLEASE keep this POSITIVE. I am not going to change my church's stigma of breastfeeding (especially not covered nursing in public) with berating and bullying. I need to focus on their hearts.

THANK YOU AHEAD OF TIME!! In the end, what I am wanting is a "package" that all women can use to present to their churches that is factual and scriptural based so it would be beyond contestation. Please put all the information in the thread on my profile where the document is so I have the information centralized. Also.. PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE share this anywhere and everywhere you think people could help with this mission to make a real difference.

"Why Seeing Breastfeeding is Important: my personal challenge to you"

This is a guest blog post by Emma Kwasnica.  I'm posting it right now, this very minute, regardless of how tired I am and how much my bed is calling me because last night I said "I'll just post this tomorrow morning..." then woke up this morning to discover that the fratboys at Facebook had DELETED Emma's article out of her personal Facebook Notes!!!  Yep, you read correctly:  Facebook apparently deemed her note to be either "Obscene" or as "an attack" on a group or person.  I kid you not.  So Emma just reposted her note on Facebook about 4 minutes ago, and this time I'm going to post it here- where the Facebots can't get to it- RIGHT NOW!!

Why SEEING breastfeeding is important : My personal challenge to you

by Emma Kwasnica on Sunday, 03 October 2010 at 22:48

I'd just like to talk a bit about the bigger picture here for a moment, in that by Facebook taking this stance against breastfeeding images, and by creating such arbitrary obscenity guidelines as "no exposed areola or nipple may be shown" (I have seen many, many women whose areola covers up to a third or more of their entire breast - a baby's mouth could never come close to "covering" it all!), it is stigmatizing breastfeeding women, and shaming women into thinking that their breasts are much, much less than the amazing life-giving source they are. Nipplephobia has reached epic proportions here in North America, and this is to the supreme detriment of babies everywhere.

Just think for one moment, how many more women would breastfeed, or for how much longer, if only we rid society of the harmful practice of over-sexualizing women's breasts! And how much this, in turn, could benefit BABIES. For whose voice do the most vulnerable members of society have, if not ours? Interestingly, we find cultures around the world where women's breasts are seen *only* in their functioning capacity, i.e., that of nourishing and comforting their young. I believe that we can get there, too (or at least try to find some balance), but we have to start somewhere, and I truly feel that there is never any harm to come from challenging the status quo (you're not surprised, I know ;-) ).

I've said this before, and I'll say it again : as a childbirth professional, but also as a woman, in general, it is absolutely crucial that one support ALL women to breastfeed their young. While you, personally, may have your own code of "decency" for how much skin YOU are comfortable showing while breastfeeding, it is important that you do not impose your own, completely arbitrary line drawn in the sand regarding "modesty" or "discreetness", onto any other breastfeeding mother. Period. Just like a woman who wants to cover up should be supported (and generally IS in our society....), we need to support those women who struggle --or those women who do not want, or care-- to cover their baby and their breast, and make life simpler for these women to, first and foremost, feed and comfort the baby!

Quite simply, this is about normalizing breastfeeding. The more we hide it away, classify it as obscene, shame mothers into covering up while feeding, and encourage women to retire to "private" rooms in order to breastfeed the baby, the less we see of it in public, and the less and less people are comfortable with the very idea of nursing in public. This is the sad reality, in this pathologically hyper-sexualized (yet sexually repressed...) North American culture of ours. The solution, however, seems quite simple to me; breastfeeding (and/or images of breastfeeding) need to be seen every day, and I am convinced that SEEING more breastfeeding, wherever possible, is what will change our breastfeeding culture. Re-normalize it. Everywhere in North America (in all provinces in Canada, and in every state in the USA but two) women have the right to breastfeed in public, wherever they have the legal right to be. So women should do it. And they should feel completely free to do it. Lots of it. As much as possible.

If you want to be a part of the solution, here is one, simple thing you can do, each and every time you see a mother breastfeeding her baby in public : yes, give her a great, big smile, but don't stop there --go right *up* to her, and tell her what a wonderful thing she is doing for her child. I guarantee you, that if we all did even this simple gesture every time we saw a woman nursing in public, the tides would begin to turn.

I would also like to suggest in your daily life (outside the 'net), that you get out there and nurse your children in public. And do so with a huge smile across your face. Pretty hard for onlookers to say, feel, or do something negative in the face of a beaming, breastfeeding mother --n'est-ce pas?

Breastfeeding is normal. Normal. NORMAL. Say it, do it, show it.

Will you start by doing these simple acts right today? Indeed, I challenge you.

Warm regards,
~Emma Kwasnica

Click on people's faces in the photo to tag them.

Emma Kwasnica & her family at the 2008 Montréal Breastfeeding Challenge. This photo and article were published in Le Journal de Montréal, a major daily francophone newspaper.
If a North American city of 2.5 million can handle this in their daily paper, why can't Facebook?"

Kim Kardashian says "cover up" to breastfeeding mothers!!

OH yeah!  Does anyone else see the uproariously hysterical, point your finger and laugh punch line to this?!?
Yes, Kim Kardishian said yesterday that she witnessed a woman in a restaurant breastfeeding her baby ...With Out a Cover!!!   Oh nooooooooo!  The Shock!  The Horror!!!!!!!!.  Ok, so said breastfeeder kinda ruined the moment by then changing her babies bum on the table (don't bitch slap me for this: but really?  changing a babies bum on the dinner table in a restaurant kinda smacks of hillbilly to me) (not that I want to offend any hillbillies!).

When kim got slapped with a backlashing from lactivists she then went on to tweet:

"My sister breast feeds! Its a natural beautiful thing, there's nothing wrong w it, but she covers herself, not w her boobs exposed "

ROTFLMFAO!!!!!!  Is she Serious?!?  This coming from a chick who's had pictures of her naked tata's plastered all over magazines and the internet?!  REALLY!!  Who the hell are you trying to fool Kim?!?

Aruban Breastfeeding Mama said it quite nicely I think:

"Oh Kim, by the first tweet you should have stopped. Now you have about, mmm, let's say, a billion tweets by  outraged lactvists with your name or a hashtag resembling #KimKisagainstbfing.

I find it absolutely comical that a woman with a show such as hers, that promotes the showing of breasts (and more) finds it offensive when a mother breastfeeds without a cover... but then again, oh right, these two things I have sitting in my bra aren't meant to be seen with a child attached to them. Silly me. Moving on.

Kim, Kimberly, I think it's time you wake up and smell the coffee. If prancing around exposing your breasts and cleavage to the whole world is acceptable to you, but nursing without a cover isn't, you gotta get your priorities in order."

So.... according to Kim, THIS is totally unacceptable

But THIS is completely OK?

STFU about NIP!!!!

Woman Uncensored lashes out with her usual panache - cutting to the quick and the core of the argument, wielding her barbed sarcasm like a master swordswoman, slicing through the bullshit with an expert flick of the keyboard. I LOVE this blog!!!!

*Insert Standing Ovation HERE*

STFU about NIP

(NIP=Nursing in public. I'll let you figure out what STFU means on your own)

I don't get to tell this guy that he's grossing me out and needs to go home

I think his butt is hungry.

I don't get to tell this lady that the sight of her could scar my children for life.

If she bends over... I don't think I'm ready for that jelly.

I don't get to tell this piece of work that he's showing too much skin.

"I've had this shirt since I was 14 and it still fits!"

I have to see T&A galore on girls walking down the street, TV, magazines, movies, online, EVERYWHERE. I don't get to toss a blanket over any of them.

Now THAT is a lot of boobage. Did someone use her cleavage as a napkin? Mmmm... greasy!

She may be at the beach here, but we've all seen Britt's butt, beaver, and more in every other public place. Heaven help us.

I may not be able to ask these folks to you know, wear clothes that fit, and I may not be able to bleach my eyes... but I do, however, have the ability to avert my eyes and go on with my life.

There are people EVERYWHERE to whom I would love to say "Please go home, for the love of Pete, you don't belong in public". But I don't have the right, and neither do you. Why can we tolerate several square feet of *whatever* hanging out, but piss ourselves over a centimeter of lactating boob? If I can tolerate standing in line behind the guy that smells like an ashtray, or walking by miss nasty thong & muffin top, or eating near smelly unshowered dude a few tables down, you can sure as hell just STFU about this:

HERE to read the whole wonderfully "in your face" article!!!