"You're NOT in Labour"

I just finished reading Gloria Lemay's blog article "You're not in Labour" and I had to smile.

“YOU’RE NOT IN LABOUR”
These are difficult words for birth attendants to say; I would say they are right up there with “I’m sorry, I’ve made a mistake.” They are, also, difficult for the birthing woman to hear. I’ve been on the receiving and giving ends of those words.
RECEIVING END
During my first home birth (second baby, 12 years after my first birth), I “laboured” all day (5 minute apart sensations that I thought “really hurt”) and at 8 p.m., my mw did a pelvic and said “you’re only 3 cms., you’re not in labour. I suggest you send all these people home, stop entertaining, go to bed, get some rest and I have to go help some other midwives at another birth.” I remember a) wanting to kill her 2) knowing somewhere inside that she was right but not liking it and 3) going into the bathroom and crying my heart out. I did as she told me, went to bed and about midnight it swung into a whole different level of intensity. I could see what she meant that I hadn’t been actively having a baby during the day. I gave birth to my baby at 2 a.m. after about 4 hours of very high gear birth sensations.
What did my midwife do for me by “giving it to me straight”?
1. She gave me the benefit of her experience which was what I paid for.
2. She respected me enough to know that I could deal with the truth and she didn’t have to candy coat it for me.
3. She opened up the possibility that, yes, things could get harder but I could manage it.
4. She provided a model for me to give to other women.

 HERE to read the entire article on Gloria's blog

I smiled as I read this because her experience was soooooo my last birth!! Contractions in the middle of the night, getting close together, yet still 6-8 minutes apart.  Feeling like "This is IT!" and walking and groaning through contractions....calling the midwives and hearing them say "Well, why do you want us to check you? Are you feeling pushy?  If the contractions are still 6-8 ,minutes apart, then...." and being SOooo angry!  Then insisting that we head to the hospital (there were other reasons besides contractions- and we were 45 minutes away, something that was a panic button for me). Arriving at the L&D ward and the midwife saying "You're 3cm..... I think you should go walk for a while and see if we can't get labour started"  .,...... Labour STARTED?!?!?!!?  Oh my Freakin' Gods!!!!!  It was devastating to me to hear those words and ultimately lead to me almost capitulating to another Caesarean section.  Truth is truth, and i'm so glad that my midwives didn't try to lie to me or hide it.... but..... can we not come up with a better sentence than "You're not in labour"?  There must be a more positive way of stating this fact?  A group of words that gives a more positive light and empowers the mother more?  What do you think?  Suggestions?

"In Defense of the Amniotic sac"

WOW!!  I just learned so much about the amniotic sac and all the wonderful things it does to protect our babies and WHY doctors and midwives should just leave it ALONE!!! 

In defence of the amniotic sac

Posted on August 20, 2010 by midwifethinking

Artificial rupture of membranes (ARM) aka ‘breaking the waters’ is a common intervention during birth. However, an ARM should not be carried out without a good understanding of how the amniotic sac and fluid function in labour. Women need to be fully informed of the risks associated this intervention before agreeing to alter their labour in this way. This post will discuss how the ‘waters’ work in labour and the implications of breaking them.
Anatomy and physiology
By the end of pregnancy the baby is surrounded by around 500-1000mls of Fluid. This is mostly made up of amniotic fluid secreted by the amniotic sac (the membranes). The baby also contributes urine and respiratory tract secretions into the fluid. The amniotic fluid is constantly being produced and renewed – Baby swallows the fluid; it is passed through the gut into the baby’s circulation; then sent out through the placenta. This process continues even if the amniotic membranes have broken. So, even when the waters have ‘gone’ there is still some fluid present ie. there is no such thing as a ‘dry labour’.
The amniotic membrane is adhered to the chorion – another membrane between the amniotic membrane and the uterus. These membranes look like one, but you can tease them apart after birth.
During pregnancy
The amniotic sac protects and prepares baby by:

• Cushioning any bumps to the abdomen.
• Maintaining a constant temperature.
• Allowing movement to aid muscle development.
• Creating space for growth.
• Protecting against infection – the membranes provide a barrier + the fluid contains antimicrobial peptides.
• Assisting lung development – baby breathes fluid in and out of the lungs.
• Taste and smell – the smell of amniotic fluid has been found to have a calming effect on newborns (Varendia et al. 1998).

After 40 weeks gestation around 20% of baby’s will pass meconium into their amniotic fluid as the bowels reach maturity and begin to work.  This is perfectly normal and is not a sign of distress. This meconium is diluted and processed with the amniotic fluid as described above.
During labour
Around 80-90% of women start their labour with their membranes intact. This is probably because the amniotic sac plays an important role in the physiology of a natural birth.
General fluid pressure
During a contraction the pressure is equalised throughout the fluid rather than directly squeezing the baby, placenta and umbilical cord. This protects the baby and his/her oxygen supply from the effects of the powerful uterine contractions. When the membranes have ruptured the placenta and baby get compressed during a contraction. Most babies can cope well with this, but the experience of birth for the baby is probably not as pleasant. When the placenta is compressed blood circulation is interrupted reducing the oxygen supply to baby. In addition, the umbilical cord may be in a position where it gets squashed between baby and uterus with contractions. When this happens the baby’s heart rate will dip during a contraction in response to the reduced blood flow. A healthy baby can cope with this intermittent reduction in oxygen supply for hours (it’s a bit like holding your breath for 30 seconds every few minutes). However, this is probably not so great to do for an extended period of time....

There are also risks associated with an ARM:

• It may increase contraction intensity and pain which can result in the woman feeling unable to cope and choosing an epidural… intervention rollercoaster begins.
• The baby may become distressed due to compression of the placenta, baby and/or cord (as described above).
• The umbilical cord may be swept down by the waters and either past the baby’s head or wedged next to the baby’s head. This is called a ‘cord prolapse’ and is an emergency situation. The compression of the cord interrupts or stops the supply of oxygen to the baby and the baby must be born asap by c-section. The only cord prolapse I have been involved with happened after an ARM (not done by me  - honest!). The outcome for the woman was a live baby born by emergency c-section. Her previous 2 babies had been vaginal births.
• If there is a blood vessel running through the membranes (see picture below) and the amni-hook ruptures the vessel the baby will lose blood volume fast – another emergency situation.
• There is a slight increase in the risk of infection but mostly for the mother (not baby). This risk is minimal if nothing is put into the vagina during labour (ie. hands, instruments etc.)....

 HERE to Read the entire article with (great links for pictures ) on Midwifes Thinking Blog

161 Reasons to Birth at Home!!!

Here is a Guest Blog by Peaceful Birth Project On Facebook.

One Hundred Sixty One Reasons to Birth at Home

by The Peaceful Birth Project on Sunday, 22 August 2010 at 13:00

A few weeks ago I posted this question on Facebook: From the sublime to the mundane, what is your reason to birth at home? Many women posted that SAFETY was their reason to birth at home. Other common responses were COMFORT, FREEDOM and BONDING with baby.

These are the voices of mothers.  My hope is that birth professionals reading this list can reflect on what women need from us and that mothers can be inspired to birth at home.   My deep appreciation goes to all the women who contributed their thoughts to this list. A CNM friend who practices in a hospital said about this list: "Incredible! I hope this blossoms and finds its way around the earth."  ENJOY and pass it on!

One Hundred Sixty One Reasons to Birth at Home

1. It's SAFER!!!!!!!!!!!!! Safety is at home, away from germs and interventions.

2. Comfort.

3. Because birth is a family event, not a medical one. Children should be welcomed into the world by the family in their family home!

4. My home has a 0% c/sec rate.

5. Freedom. Freedom to be myself, do what I want, make my own choices without pressure; birth my baby any way I want...

6. Knowing that if I had to transfer, it was a *true* need; not just something that was policy and wonder about for years after.

7. Why should I have to ride in a car while in labor, just to get to the hospital?

8. So that I may move at my own pace and not the pace imposed by another!

9. No need to pack a bag!

10. Eat your own food when you want to, sleep in your own bed, no noisy hospital roommates.

11. Because my vaj is no one's hand puppet!

12. Avoids the cascade of interventions!!

13. Because I can snack and drink during labor to keep me strong.

14. You can't forget anything,

15. You don't have to travel with a newborn.

16. You can always remember exactly where they were born (you may even have stains to prove it).

17. You can have your children or pets with you.

18. You're more likely to find something of comfort at home than in a sterile hospital.

19. No visiting hours, no "protocol", NO PRESSURE.

20. Freedom to walk around outside.

21. A kitchen full of food.

22. I want to poop and puke in my own toilet in my own bathroom.

23. Control of the birthing environment and your own body.

24. Freedom from foreign germs (all the germs are mine and my family's). The germs in your home are your own and you don't have to risk being exposed to other people's germs and/or drug-resistant strains prevalent in hospitals.

25. Freedom from hospital policy.

26. Freedom to eat and drink to keep up strength. My refrigerator would be stocked with food that I like!

27. Freedom from inhibitions.

28. Freedom from stirrups.

29. Freedom from constant badgering.

30. I can both labor in the tub and push in the tub.

31. I can get into my OWN bed right away and breastfeed in the comfort of my own home.

32. No shift changes!!! The people you invite to your birth are the people that will see you through... No "oh it's 6pm, gotta go, hope you like the next person"

33. Going to sleep in your own bed after baby is born. No one waking you up to take your vitals at 2am, usually right after you've finally fallen asleep.

34. Care providers who believe in my body's ability to birth and are there to support that experience, not that they are present to SAVE me from an inherently dangerous process.

35. My own smells, stuff, noises and all the stuff baby has already been exposed to in utero.

36. It's safe to walk around barefoot :) I felt like that was gross in the hospital.

37. You won't get shrieked at for getting out of bed.

38. To avoid 'moving quickly upon the earth'; it's ingrained in our psyche to be close to the earth in labor... moving at highway speeds goes against our instincts.

39. No separation for a few hours while the nurses take your baby to check on their vitals!!! Everything waits on you and your baby!!! It's so hard to be separated for that long after having the baby in you for 9 - 10 months!!!

40. You can make as much noise as you dang well please!

41. Traveling in labor sucks!

42. Midwife comes to me for post-partum checks.

43. My first son was injured by the traumatic birth in the hospital; I didn't want to repeat that.

44. Big brother could be sleeping in the same house while I was birthing.

45. My husband got to be my "birth stool" to support me.

46. I can say my child was conceived and birthed in the same bed. ;)

47. No IV's, EFM's (external or internal), forceps/vacuums, episiotomies, Pitocin, or scratchy blood pressure cuffs. No cranky nurses.

48. My midwife actually knew how to help a woman who wasn't numb other than using knives or needles.

49. I could scream as loud as I wanted without worry about upsetting other patients.

50. WAYYYYY Less chance of a c-section!!!!

51. You can light candles at home.

52. Waterbirth in the comfort of our own home, warm wonderful loving women attending, eating our own food, feeling safe and secure, no threat of interventions, curling up after baby is born in my own bed... and waking there with my baby the next morning... ah, homebirth - it's the BEST!!

53. Because my midwife makes me cookies and does the dishes.

54. No bright lights, calm atmosphere, comfort, familiar people around me. I can have family there.

55. I feel respected, I am not rushed, and I can use the tub to relax.

56. If I need a moment alone I can get that and be respected for it.

57. No one takes the baby away from me.

58. I can have my toddler with me.

59. My husband is able to 'catch' the baby.

60. If I don't want my midwives to touch me they will respect that.

61. Birth is way more fun at home!!

62. My MAIN reason for birthing at home is because it was a SAFER environment for me to birth in. I trusted my care provider and felt like an active participant in the decision-making process during my entire labor and birth.

63. I've experienced a HORRIBLE labor that ended in an unnecesarean and completely eroded my faith and trust in OBs. With that being my head-space about them, there's NO WAY I'd ever trust another OB enough to take any advice towards intervention.......which could potentially put me in danger of refusing an intervention that MIGHT be medically prudent. I know that's not something I have to worry about with my competent, trustworthy midwife who patiently coached me through my labor. That dynamic alone makes homebirth a safer option for me.........I know that I won't refuse an intervention based upon mistrust of my care provider and therefore, I'm in a safer birthing environment should I actually NEED intervention.

64. To quote my FAVORITE musician of all time, Dave Matthews, on the homebirth of his son, August Oliver: "We had him at home, which was nice, because I knew where the beer was." My husband shares his sentiments.

65. Being able to be naked without a big audience.

66. Being able to burp or toot at will without embarrassment.

67. Being able to yell, moan, or cuss without feeling bad.

68. Being able to birth a baby in the same bed she was lovingly made in (unless it was a patio conception after drinks)

69. Privacy and Peace.

70. No rush in cutting the cord.

71. Because I don't have to have the carseat properly installed... just roll over and cuddle my baby!

72. So I can be naked and comfortable, eat food, birth in whatever position I want, to lay there awhile and no one rush off with my baby.

73. So my hands or my husband's hands are first to touch our baby.

74. To avoid unnecessary interventions.

75. To lay on my own recliner to recover :)

76. To eliminate the when-to-leave build up! "Am I ripe enough?","Did we pack everything?","Will I get sent home?", "Birth in the car?", "traffic?"

77. To be able to not worry about the complications of a repeat c section, because the hospital doesn't allow VBACS.

78. Because my husband can TRULY be there (he has a brain injury and while fine at home doesn't do well in new places).

79. Because birth is normal and hospitals are for SICK people. Pregnancy is not a sickness.

80. Wonderful homebirth midwives!!!

81. Because I am a VBAC and wanted a vaginal birth.

82. To experience the spiritual event of birth without interference.

83. No one to take your baby away to 'check on them'. Or someone else to give them their first bath. (Always cracks me up when friends post pictures of their baby's 'first bath'. At home, after they got home from the hospital).

84. The endless list of benefits to both mom and baby from not touching them when everything is going fine (less tearing, baby rotating on its own, no 'purple pushing', delayed cord clamping [if at all], using vernix as a lotion [as opposed to thinking it's acid and has to come off NOW], immediate skin-to-skin [and nothing to interrupt that].

85. WAITING on the placenta= less chance for PP hemorrhage.

86. No one abusing my baby with "standard procedures" of unnecessary suctioning, scrubbing off vernix, poking with needles and enforced separation for warming. Seeing the way newborns are treated in hospital always makes me cry.

87. Made perfect sense for such an intimate, private event to be in the sanctuary of our home. x3

88. I have everything I need!

89. You feel so much more comfortable in your own home.

90. Avoiding transition (or any contraction for that matter) in the car!

91. Birthing at home let me create a reverent atmosphere to birth my baby into the world.

92. Your chiropractor can be a part of your birth team :)

93. Not getting cut open, not having CPS called for refusing medical care, no drug mix ups almost killing my kid or me.

94. Showering, in my own shower with my own towels, soap, and shampoo right after.

95. Baby watching football with daddy while I nap.

96. Chocolate chip cookies and roast beef for after-birth meal.

97. No worry about baby being kidnapped.

98. My belief in my body's ability to do what it was made to do - while avoiding this country's "standardized series of unfortunate events".

99. Sleeping with hubby (and baby, and other kids)

100. Home is the place where there's everything you need.

101. At home I can be naked, roar like a lioness and throw my head back with abandon without anyone batting an eye.

102. It is the only place where my 5 year old can assist "her baby" in coming into the world and "teach her/him to be alive."

103. Home is where I can hide in the corner if I need a break from everything, knowing that the floor is clean and I can nest there if I want.

104. At home, I can drink from my favorite cup and look at all of my family photos for strength.

105. I can light candles and "be alone" with my husband if labor slows.

106. I can birth my baby where/however I am most comfortable, shower with my own lovely towels, and feel truly safe for myself and my baby.

107. When it's over, it's over, and I can snuggle with everyone in my big bed and my oldest child, 1/4 of my lovely little family, will not be kicked out to stay with others while the other 3/4 of her family is going through an amazing transformation. That's truly the most important reason. No one will separate me from my baby - EITHER of them. :)

108. The postpartum is so so sweet.

109. The whole situation was about me and my baby. Everyone attending the birth was there for us and only us.

110. I can have a VBAC without fear of the medical staff pushing/scaring me to have a c-section like the first time around!

111. I don't want to wind up with the flu, since I'll be giving birth at the height of flu season.

112. As and L&D nurse (and midwife), I know what happens at the hospital. I didn't birth at home 3 times so much for me (I could take on anything), but for my babies. At home, there is no "accidental" formula feedings if he is found crying in the nursery after being taken there for "mandatory" procedures. No "accidental" procedures such as vit K, eye ointment, vaccinations (which are done so routinely that most nurses do a double take if you decline something). And for my sons, I didn't want them within 1000 feet of a scalpel or circ board... Most L&D nurses are well meaning (didn't know the babe was to be brought back to mom for breastfeeding after the nightly bath and weight and oops gave a bottle), but I didn't want any accidents happening. And as much as I'd like to think I'd protect them, even I know there are rules the most determined mother can't get around...

113. Being able to really let go and enjoy laborland... no reservations.

114. Plenty to keep you busy (dishes, scrapbooks, cleaning) and no one to rush you.

115. You'll never forget to pack anything.

116. No internal checks unless desired.

117. Drinking wine.

118. Thinking months later about how it all happened in this very room.

119. Making a snack afterwards in your own kitchen.

120. No annoying beeping to wake you up or nurses in and out pushing on your belly and micromanaging your nursing.

121. I was fortunate to have all of my seven babies at home. For me, it was about family, birthing the way I chose (with few interventions), and experiencing labor, birth and post partum in a peaceful way.

122. So that you can retreat to reach your power.

123. Bonding with baby!

124. Modesty and dignity.

125. It's family friendly.

126. Because NOTHING ELSE EVEN COMPARES.

127. It's our space, and people are coming into our space and need to respect our wishes.

128. I don't want to be abused!

129. My husband feels freer to be an active part of the labor process than if we were in the hospital.

130. As a doula I see women at home in labor, doing great in their own place, in their own surroundings, surrounded by those they love, doing their thing,... going into themselves, trusting their bodies, working with their bodies, trusting birth, trusting themselves, smiling at the joy of knowing it is going the way it should go, such beauty, candles, music, stripped off moving about the way they should and want, their husbands believing they can do this, encouraged, watching in disbelief at such a strong empowered women is their wife.

131. I can do what I want and also don't have "white coat syndrome" that they diagnose as PIH (Pregnancy Induced Hypertension) that happened with my first baby. No monitors, no IV's, no intruding guests... No one has to know except for me, my husband and my midwife!

132. The birth of my first daughter was horrific (in the hospital) I vowed never to do it again...... No impatient Dr.'s, no rude nurses, I don't have to be chained to the bed by IV's or internal monitors, or having someone telling what I can and can't do during labor, I had to BEG and beg for them to let move 2 feet from the bed to the rocker during my first birth.

133. No one taking my baby away 2 seconds after they are born to be poked and prodded against my will, they gave my daughter Vit K shot without my consent...

134. I can be in own comfortable bed in my own home and not feel like I am in prison!

135. Birth at home because home is where the heart is. Plain and simple.

136. I loved the fact that I was in control... that my body decided how and what will happen...

137. The fact that my family could spend the night with me and that my baby girl was with me all the time!!

138. No strangers! Being completely surrounded by the people of my choosing!

139. Getting to push without a doc's hand inside "telling you where" to push.

140. Getting to cuddle as a family afterward....

141. To be able to sit in firelight and tell stories with your midwife and best friend (when contractions are still coming 10 minutes apart of course).

142. You get to decide when you call your midwife and birth team... early on if you prefer to have someone nearby or late in labor if you prefer to labor alone.

143. Obstetricians are surgeons, childbirth is not a disease.

144. What is safer than having one (or more) care providers with you and only you, not being sidetracked by other clients with needs?

145. Deciding where and in what position you would like to birth your baby.

146. Reaching down and receiving your own baby.

147. You can focus all your energy and power into birthing your baby instead of preventing interventions and warding off strangers.

148. Recovery is faster with fewer interventions.

149. A homebirth is cheaper than a C-section.

150. I can be as green as I want.

151. You don't need an ID bracelet for the mother or the baby.

152. I can birth in my backyard.

153. You don't end up with a "gift bag" (marketing samples) from big corporate America, full of disposable diapers, formula, baby wipes, shampoo, soaps, and brand propaganda.

154. Your baby's placenta does not become a biohazard.

155. You can have a lotus birth.

156. Your best friend can make you a placenta smoothie.

157. I can choose the room for the birth, or change rooms in the middle of things.

158. Wear your own clothes or no clothes at all!

159. No pushy hospital nurses!!!!

160. Because I can.

161. Why not?!

Being the change you wish to see in the world

I talk here on Informed Parenting about change and about women (and men) standing up and fighting for their Rights- their Rights to Birth their children in peace and without violence or emotional trauma. Their Right to birth at home. Their Rights to Nurse their babies, in public and at home, without guilt and without worry, and to be supported in their journey of nursing their children for as long as they wish.  Their Rights to take their WHOLE baby home, intact and unmolested.  Their RIGHTS. For without taking a stand our Rights will be trodden on and trampled by the galloping hoards of faceless bureaucrats and the cold medical machine that suffers a god complex. If we don't speak out, who will? If we don't speak out, who will encourage others to raise their voices with us? It all starts with one voice.

There are people that stand out as activists of the first order.  People who were not afraid to stand up and be heard, who saw injustice and inequality and said "This is WRONG!" And they stood tall and proud regardless of the ridicule and persecution. Dr. Martin Luther King comes to mind when we think of this kind of activist. Dr. King was arrested 30 times for taking a stand and speaking out against racism in the 50's and 60's, yet now he is revered as hero and the changes he stood up for are accepted as the norm in society. It didn't happen over night and it wasn't easy but nothing worth fighting for ever is. 

Within the circles of Childbirth and Childrens Rights activists there are a few names that stand out. Gloria Lemay is one of our greatest activists and heros, who has suffered over and over, including going to prison for what she believed in, but has never given up or bowed to the pressure that was put upon her.  In "Jan's Corner" of Midwifery Today Magazine Jan Tritten writes about "Midwifery under Fire".  Jan writes:

"We’ve had a period of relative calm in the North American midwifery community since 2002. In an issue of Midwifery Today E-News from July 2001 (http://www.midwiferytoday.com/enews/enews0329.asp), Sandra Stine, CNM, wrote about the history of midwives under fire:
“I am thinking about Yvonne Cryns, Nan Koehler, Abby Odam, the granny midwives and every other traditional birth attendant in this country who has been crucified by the AMA or another source,” Stine stated. “Wonderful, loving, competent midwives have been jailed, lost their homes, spent thousands of dollars defending themselves, or were placed under house arrest while serving families competently. The AMA (American Medical Association) has a track record of prosecuting midwives in almost every state!”
In July of 2002, Gloria Lemay was imprisoned for contempt of court in Canada. A few months later, Mennonite midwife Freida Miller was arrested and imprisoned for contempt of court in Ohio. Thanks to easy Internet access in 2002, the stories of these imprisonments—and of the events that built up to them—were relayed around the globe. Both women were mature adults and both went to prison knowing they had widespread support in the international community. They went to prison with their heads held high and their supporters worked behind the scenes, fundraising and researching to free them. Money and well wishes flowed in from all over the world. North American midwives had entered a new era.
While in prison, Lemay learned that she would be given an award for being “the woman in Canada who had made the biggest contribution to midwifery care in the year 2002.” (Women’s Voice Award).

 ""We’ve had a period of relative calm in the North American midwifery community since 2002" Jan says.... yet it would seem that this period of relative calm is coming to an end, and not just in the field of Midwifery.  Recently there have been negative articles in the media about the safety of home births, negative articles in the media about Breastfeeding, and now articles about male circumcision that hint that the CDC and the American Paediatric Society might be about to do a flip flop and change their official recommendations that there is no medical reason to support Male Circumcision. (which is absolutely false BTW).

All around us we see the Medical Machine, Big Pharma and other professional associations, with their assumed godhead, trying to chip away if not yank right out from under us our Human Rights. But worse is that there are the innocent sheeple out there that are going to listen and are going to assume that this is how it must be.  They will tow the official party line and maybe not discover until much too late that their Rights have been burned at the stake on the altar of the big green buck. That they have lost something precious that can never be reclaimed because they blindly followed the recommendations of those who serve themselves while pretending to be working for the people. Some people might sneer that it's their own damn fault for not researching and educating themselves about their choices, but we cannot blame the sheeple for their blind devotion- children grow up only knowing what they've been taught by their elders and if their elders knew no better than how can they teach the younger generation to think for themselves?  The sheeple will never learn about their Rights and the real information and choices unless those of us who DO know better stand up and tell them.

It isn't easy being the lone voice.  It isn't easy being that person standing above the bellowing crowds on a soap box trying to make yourself heard.  But if you don't do it who will?  There are voices of reason out there that are fighting for YOUR Rights, and the Rights of your children, every day.  People like Gloria Lemay who even in prison kept educating women. People like Danelle Frisbie  of  "Peaceful Parenting" who Fights for the Rights of infant boys everywhere to keep all of their body parts and not suffer mutilation at the hands of those who deem it "OK".  People like Dr. Jack Newman and Edith Kernerman of the Newman Breastfeeding Clinic & Institute who continually challenge the government to provide more Breastfeeding support and better education for medical personnel.  THESE people are your champions and deserve to hear OUR voices!!!

One of the worlds greatest activists Mahatma Gandhi once said "You must be the change that you want to see in the world". 

If you think the world is wrong, that the need for change is great, then lend your voices to the few so that they may soon become the many. A whisper can become a roar if enough voices are heard at once and NOW is the time to raise your voice!

"Birth and Violence", Part 1

"Birth Rape" by Dani Arnold-McKenny 2010

"Trauma" "Rape" "Violence"... Shocking words that conjure shocking images, yet when you put the word "Birth" in front of them, immediately you will get a hoard of people pooh poohing you, telling you that there is no such thing, it's all in your head,  or my  two favorites:

"Get Over It!" & "At least you have a healthy baby".

Nothing subjugates modern western women more than those two sentences. Not just because they belittle, humiliate and demean women, but because they are spoken constantly and by the very people that these women thought they could trust: Doctors and Husbands, Fathers and Brothers, Friends and Co-Workers.... and yes, even by their own mothers and sisters and female friends.

... "get over it" as in: Stop your whining and trying to get attention- just grow up and get on with it.

... "at least you have a healthy baby" as in: you have absolutely no value other than as a baby incubator.

And yet women will utter those words to post partum mothers all the time!!!

One article I've read talks about the experience of one women "Lynsey" who was subjected to verbal ridicule and physical assault by her midwife in England:

As a result of this trauma, Lynsey suffered from post traumatic stress disorder and tokophobia (fear of childbirth). She became deeply depressed, had nightmares and flashbacks, trouble bonding with her son, and her marriage nearly broke down because her husband couldn’t acknowledge that she was raped by the midwife and he had stood by while it happened. He begged her to stop calling it rape and to let it go, get on with her life. As so many new mothers can attest, any anger, sadness or disappointment expressed about the birth is usually swept under the rug. Everyone says: “Yes, but it’s all in the past now. You have a healthy baby and that’s all that matters.” As if the woman who endured the birthing experience was merely a passive observer, the emotionless vehicle through which the baby arrived.

We like to think that the bygone era of  "Twilight Birthing" is over, that the Cruelty of Maternity wards during the 40's and 50's is just a bad memory that we try not to talk about, but we have a much bigger problem in our society.  A dilemma that is so pervasive and enigmatic that it stares us in the face daily, yet society as a whole is incapable of seeing it. Sexism is alive and well in our so called "developed nations".  For generations women have fought for the Right to Vote, the Right to advanced schooling, the Right to have "Equal Rights".  We cheered when court battles were won that pushed the Rights of women into the media and force laws to be changed.  Yet When it comes to the ultimate of Human and Womens Rights, the Right to birth in peace, the Right to informed consent and the Right to be treated with dignity, we are kept completely in the dark.  So much so that many many women don't even realize that their Rights have been violated. And when they leave the hospital to begin that incredible journey of motherhood feeling traumatized and degraded, as if they've just returned home from a horrific battle, they are told to smile and get over it.  They are told that the anxiety and depression is just because they are tired and it will get better.  They are told that their inability to bond with their child is just because it's "all new" and that they'll get use to parenting soon. And when they can't "get over it" they are treated as if they are lazy, weak, selfish or even crazy. So these women suffer in silence and internalize their pain until many times it overwhelms them.

 If they were members of the Armed Forces, they  would get attention and treatment and councilling for their Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD), but as mothers they are are left to fend for themselves.

More and more women develop some of the symptoms of PTSD.  All of these women suffer birth trauma.  An Australian study found 1 out of 3 women reported a stressful birthing event with three or more trauma symptoms when interviewed 4-6 weeks after a vaginal delivery.  [Creedy et al Childbirth and the Development of Acute Trauma Symptoms: Incidence & Contributing Factors Birth 27(2), 104 – 111]. 

Birth Trauma Canada gives an extensive outline of what causes birth trauma. A vast proportion of  these causes are those things that have "been done to" the mother- medical interventions being forced without full consent or full disclosure, poor labour support, being denied food, water, clothing, courtesy or respect by medical personnel, being ignored, dismissed, disrespected and denied.  I just finished reading the NavelGazing Midwife's article about Birth Rape and wanted to cry as I can remember going through so many of these examples my self through several of my births.

Birthrape: The experience of having fingers, scissors, and/or tools put/pushed/shoved inside a woman's vagina or rectum without her direct (or indirect) permission.

Being coerced, manipulated, or lied to regarding the health and safety of the baby or themselves so the midwife is able to do something to the mother's vagina, rectum, cervix, or perineum, usually with excuses; rarely with apologies.

Some find the definition expanded to:

The midwife taking the woman's Power by using disparaging comments, unsupportive expressions, speaking around her as if she is unable to hear or process requests or information.

and

Even though consent forms are signed in the hospital, birth center, and at home, consent for care does not include the manipulations or coercive words to get women to obey the caregiver....

Directives That Disembody Her Being
* Lift her leg.
* Move her to the bed.
* Grab her knees.
* Put her feet in the stirrups.
* Put her hands on the grips.
* Push her head to her chest.
* Push her chin to her chest.
* Put pillows under her head.
* Put pillows under her butt.
* Pull her down to the edge of the bed.
* Push with her so she knows how to do it right.
* Count for her so she knows how to do it right.
Coercive and Manipulative Remarks
* pressing knees apart - I need to do a vaginal exam.
* C'mon, just let me see what is going on.
* I'll do it quick and fast, I promise.
* I promise to be gentle.
* I just want to see how dilated you are.
 * I'm just feeling your cervix... it might hurt a little. (as manipulations to the cervix are done... from stripping the membranes to manual dilation)
* I'm just feeling your cervix. (as cytotec is put onto the cervix)
* Do you want your baby to die?...

 Where does a woman go for help, when the medical professionals themselves give no credence to their mental state and pooh pooh their birthing experience? Not just Doctors and Nurses, but Midwives too!! Who does a woman turn to for support when she wishes to have another child?  The NavelGazing Midwife goes on to say

"I share them and am writing about them and speaking about them and nearly screaming about them in the hopes that midwives will hear what they are saying that is sending their clients into therapy, pushing them to depressions that require medication and alternative therapies, keeping them from coming back to the midwife at all because of her Power Hunger and covert misogyny. Too many women (in my opinion) find Unattended Birth their only acceptable option after their experiences with professional caregivers in birth."

 Women would rather have their babies at home with just their partner for help and comfort, than to face the very real trauma of dealing with the medical personnel that inflicted them with so much physical, emotional and mental pain and abuse. And some women will forgo having another child altogether to insure that they never have to live through the ordeal again.

Our patriarchal society has for generations kept a close rein on pregnancy and childbirth, insisting that women be denigrated and treated as if they are too stupid to have any control over their own bodies- an automatic incubator that functions within the parameters of the medical machines controlling arms.  If the incubator is unable to fulfil it's designated roll within those parameters then the necessary steps must be taken to put the machine back on track..... regardless of the will of the incubator..I mean "Woman". Though we might look to midwives to change this, they too are under the thumb of "the man", and are under constant pressure from medical associations, hospitals and doctors to toe the line or else loose their privileges in their catchment hospital or even their own midwifery governing body.

So what do you do? Women need to take back their births and use their power to empower other women to follow suit.  Until we stand up for ourselves change will not happen. Until we support each other through our experiences in childbirth and educate and share our knowledge and voices, we will not be free to exercise our Womens Rights to give birth and reclaim our births.

To Quote Amity Reed from "The F Word":

"No means No, even in the delivery room"